今日在读The road less traveled一书，想查查书中的一句话（与地图相关），一搜索，就发现了俞敏洪的博文人生的地图，很短，先引用在此： http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_4711b54e010006ka.html 从中学开始，我就对地理很感兴趣，而最感兴趣的就是地图，面对一张地图，我能够好几小时一动不动地测算从一个地点到另一个地点的距离，并且想象着一路的山山水水风光无限。直到今天，收藏地图依然是我的癖好。高考那阵子，我最骄傲的就是能够把中国地图和世界地图用飞快的速度画出来，并把一个个国家和地点标在上面，渴望未来有一天能够到这些地方走一走。大学的时候，我旅行过一些地方，骑自行车，徒步旅行，或钻在火车的座位底下，怎么省钱怎么来。但更多的时候只能对着地图发呆，梦想着自己哪一天能够自由自在在全世界行走，心中就常常涌起一阵激动。 工作后经济条件允许了，我开始把自己的旅行梦想从地图上搬到现实中。从小在大自然中长大，每天都能够看到日出日落，星转斗移，因此对自己的方向感充满了自信，觉得走到任何地方都不太容易迷路。因此只要有朋友一起出去，我都会承担指路的任务，或者干脆自己亲自把朋友们从一个地方带到另一个地方。我在朋友中认路的能力是出了名的，几乎总能找到我要到达的地方。我一个人也走过很多地方，很少有迷路的时候，因此对自己的方向辨别能力产生了过分的自信，总以为即使没有地图，也能走遍天下。 直到碰上了几件事情，才使我懂得没有地图或其他设备指引方向，自以为很好的方向感，只是一种错觉。有一次和朋友开车到呼伦贝尔草原旅行，汽车开进草原后，突然发现天地浑然一体，四面都是无穷无尽的绿草伸向天边，根本分不出东南西北，汽车在茫茫的草原上打转寸步难行。最近有一次我在美国开车旅行，没有地图造成的痛苦给我留下了深刻记忆。从纽约开车到波士顿，本来只要走95号高速公路一直开就到了，因此我就没有带上美国地图，但开到一个路段之后，前面因为交通事故堵得水泄不通，因此我只能从一个出口开出去，结果开进了美国的一个小镇，这个小镇有很多纵横交错的不规则街道，一会就使我失去了方向，由于小镇没有地图卖，我们只能向居民问路，他们都热情指路，但我们还是常常绕回小镇，最后折腾了两个小时，才发现另外一条大路的入口离我们只不过两英里左右。 这件事给我留下的教训是，以后如果没有地图我再也不进入陌生的地方，也使我深刻意识到预先弄清楚到达目的地的路径是多么重要。我们很多人对自己最终想要得到什么都很清楚，但对于如何设计到达目的地的路径却常常草率。如果你问人们五年或十年以后的理想是什么，大多数人都能够清楚地说出来，比如到国外读书啦、成为某一领域的专家啦；但很少有人认真去设计实现目标的路径，甚至连路能不能走得通都不知道。于是很多人在走向目标的过程中就开始迷失方向，盲目转圈，走了很多弯路，甚至走错了道路，与既定的目标背道而驰，还有一些人走向了死路。 所以，在走向人生的目的地之前，先为自己设计一张人生地图就十分重要，在地图上要把起点标出来，把目的地标出来，把到达目的地的路径标出来，还必须要有足够的心理准备应付意外情况发生，一旦原定的路径走不通如何确定新的路径。人生不仅仅是为了走向一个结果，同样重要的是走向结果的路径选择。有人生的地图在手中，走在风中雨中你都不会迷失方向，你的一辈子就会比你想象的走得更远，到达的目的地更多，因此也就会有更多的精彩。 http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/articlelist_1192342862_7_1.html 我把自己的读书笔记也抄几段，录于此，以共享： Scott Peck：The road less traveled translated by: 于海生 Dedication to reality The third tool of discipline or technique of dealing with the pain of problem-solving, which must continually be employed if our lives are to be healthy and our spirits are to grow, is dedication to the truth. Superficially, this should be obvious. For truth is reality. That which is false is unreal. The more clearly we see the reality of the world, the better equipped we are to deal with the world. The less clearly we see the reality of the worldthe more our minds are befuddled by falsehood, misperceptions and illusionsthe less able we will be to determine correct courses of action and make wise decisions. Our view of reality is like a map with which to negotiate the terrain of life. If the map is true and accurate, we will generally know where we are, and if we have decided where we want to go, we will generally know how to get there. If the map is false and inaccurate, we generally will be lost. While this is obvious, it is something that most people to a greater or lesser degree choose to ignore. They ignore it because our route to reality is not easy. First of all, we are not born with maps; we have to make them, and the making requires effort. The more effort we make to appreciate and perceive reality, the larger and more accurate our maps will be. But many do not want to make this effort. Some stop making it by the end of adolescence. Their maps are small and sketchy, their views of the world narrow and misleading. By the end of middle age most people have given up the effort. They feel certain that their maps are complete and their Weltanschauung is correct (indeed, even sacrosanct), and they are no longer interested in new information. It is as if they are tired. Only a relative and fortunate few continue until the moment of death exploring the mystery of reality, ever enlarging and refining and redefining their understanding of the world and what is true. But the biggest problem of map-making is not that we have to start from scratch, but that if our maps are to be accurate we have to continually revise them. The world itself is constantly changing. Glaciers come, glaciers go. Cultures come, cultures go. There is too little technology, there is too much technology. Even more dramatically, the vantage point from which we view the world is constantly and quite rapidly changing. When we are children we are dependent, powerless. As adults we may be powerful. Yet in illness or an infirm old age we may become powerless and dependent again. When we are poor, the world looks different from when we are rich. We are daily bombarded with new information as to the nature of reality. If we are to incorporate this information, we must continually revise our maps, and sometimes when enough new information has accumulated, we must make very major revisions. The process of making revisions, particularly major revisions, is painful, sometimes excruciatingly painful. And herein lies the major source of many of the ills of mankind. What happens when one has striven long and hard to develop a working view of the world, a seemingly useful, workable map, and then is confronted with new information suggesting that that view is wrong and the map needs to be largely redrawn? The painful effort required seems frightening, almost overwhelming. What we do more often than not, and usually unconsciously, is to ignore the new information. Often this act of ignoring is much more than passive. We may denounce the new information as false, dangerous, heretical, the work of the devil. We may actually crusade against it, and even attempt to manipulate the world so as to make it conform to our view of reality. Rather than try to change the map, an individual may try to destroy the new reality. Sadly, such a person may expand much more energy ultimately in defending an outmoded view of the world than would have been required to revise and correct it in the first place. 这段译文引自：于海生 翻译《少有人走的路》吉林文史出版社 尊重事实 尊重事实，是自律的第三种原则。尊重事实，意味着如实看待现实，杜绝虚假，因为虚假与事实完全对立。我们越是了解事实，处理问题就越是得心应手；对现实了解得越少，思维就越是混乱。虚假、错觉和幻觉，只能让我们不知所措。我们对现实的观念就像是一张地图，凭借这张地图，我们同人生的地形、地貌不断协调和谈判。地图准确无误，我们就能确定自己的位置，知道要到什么地方，怎样到达那里；地图漏洞百出，我们就会迷失方向。 道理很明显，但多数人仍然漠视事实。通向事实的道路并不平坦，我们出生时，并不是带着地图来到世界的。为在人生旅途上顺利行进，我们需要绘制地图，为此显然要付出努力。我们的努力越大，对事实的认识越清楚，地图的准确性就越高。相当多的人却对认识事实缺乏兴趣。有的人过了青春期，就放弃了绘制地图。他们原有的地图窄小、模糊、粗略，对世界的认识狭隘而偏激。大多数人过了中年，就自认为地图完美无缺，世界观没有任何瑕疵，甚至自以为神圣不可侵犯，对于新的信息和资讯，他们也没有多少兴趣，似已疲惫不堪。只有极少数幸运者能继续努力，他们不停地探索、扩大和更新自己对于世界的认识，直到生命终结。 绘制人生地图的艰难，不在于我们需要从头开始，而是惟有不断修订，才能使地图内容翔实和准确。世界不断变化，冰山来了，冰山继而消退；文化出现，文化随即消失；技术有限，技术又似乎无限我们观察世界的角度，也处于更新和调整中。我们从弱小的、依赖性很强的孩子，一点点地成长为强有力的、被他人依赖的成年人；我们生病或衰老时，力量再次消失，我们又变得虚弱而且更有依赖性。成家立业、生儿育女，都会使我们的世界观发生改变。孩子从婴儿长到青春期，我们的心情也会发生变化。我们贫穷时，世界是一种样子；我们富有了，世界又是另外的样子。身边每天都有新的资讯，要吸收它们，地图的修订就要不断进行。足够多的崭新资讯累积成山，我们甚至不得不对地图做大规模修订，这使修订工作越发艰难，有时给我们带来更大的痛苦，这也成为许多心理疾病的根源。 人生苦短，我们只想一帆风顺。我们由儿童成长为青年人、中年人乃至老年人，付出不懈的努力，才成就了人生观、世界观的地图，似乎各方面都完美无缺。一旦新的资讯与过去的观念发生冲突，需要对地图大幅度修正，我们就会感到恐惧，宁可对新的资讯视而不见。我们的态度也变得相当奇特不只是被动抗拒新的资讯，甚至指责新的资讯混淆是非，说它们是异端邪说，是来自邪恶势力。我们想控制周围的一切，使之完全符合我们的地图。我们花费大量时间和精力（远比修订地图本身多得多），去捍卫过时而陈腐的观念，却不去考虑如何更新旧的地图，这是多么可悲的事情啊！ 【备注】： 这一段文字，给我很深的启发。 人生路途上，需要不断的修订地图，这样才能走出人生低谷与人生荒漠，走向美丽的家园。 人类看问题，读人生，每时每刻都在运用一种认知方法，那就是：通过隐喻的方式来解构外在与内在的世界。 有时间再来展开论述。
The road less traveled 读书笔记（二）：responsibility, dedication to the truth and balancing Responsibility We cannot solve lifes problems except by solving them. This statement may seem idiotically tautological or self-evident, yet it is seemingly beyond the comprehension of much of the human race. This is because we must accept responsibility for a problem before we can solve it. We cannot solve a problem by saying Its not my problem. We cannot solve a problem by hoping that someone else will solve it for us. I can solve a problem only when I say This is my problem and its up to me to solve it. But many, so many, seek to avoid the pain of their problems by saying to themselves: This problem was caused me by other people, or by social circumstances beyond my control, and therefore it is up to other people or society to solve this problem for me. It is not really my personal problem. Dedication to reality The third tool of discipline or technique of dealing with the pain of problem-solving, which must continually be employed if our lives are to be healthy and our spirits are to grow, is dedication to the truth. Superficially, this should be obvious. For truth is reality. That which is false is unreal. The more clearly we see the reality of the world, the better equipped we are to deal with the world. The less clearly we see the reality of the worldthe more our minds are befuddled by falsehood, misperceptions and illusionsthe less able we will be to determine correct courses of action and make wise decisions. Our view of reality is like a map with which to negotiate the terrain of life. If the map is true and accurate, we will generally know where we are, and if we have decided where we want to go, we will generally know how to get there. If the map is false and inaccurate, we generally will be lost. While this is obvious, it is something that most people to a greater or lesser degree choose to ignore. They ignore it because our route to reality is not easy. First of all, we are not born with maps; we have to make them, and the making requires effort. The more effort we make to appreciate and perceive reality, the larger and more accurate our maps will be. But many do not want to make this effort. Some stop making it by the end of adolescence. Their maps are small and sketchy, their views of the world narrow and misleading. By the end of middle age most people have given up the effort. They feel certain that their maps are complete and their Weltanschauung is correct (indeed, even sacrosanct), and they are no longer interested in new information. It is as if they are tired. Only a relative and fortunate few continue until the moment of death exploring the mystery of reality, ever enlarging and refining and redefining their understanding of the world and what is true. But the biggest problem of map-making is not that we have to start from scratch, but that if our maps are to be accurate we have to continually revise them. The world itself is constantly changing. Glaciers come, glaciers go. Cultures come, cultures go. There is too little technology, there is too much technology. Even more dramatically, the vantage point from which we view the world is constantly and quite rapidly changing. When we are children we are dependent, powerless. As adults we may be powerful. Yet in illness or an infirm old age we may become powerless and dependent again. When we are poor, the world looks different from when we are rich. We are daily bombarded with new information as to the nature of reality. If we are to incorporate this information, we must continually revise our maps, and sometimes when enough new information has accumulated, we must make very major revisions. The process of making revisions, particularly major revisions, is painful, sometimes excruciatingly painful. And herein lies the major source of many of the ills of mankind. What happens when one has striven long and hard to develop a working view of the world, a seemingly useful, workable map, and then is confronted with new information suggesting that that view is wrong and the map needs to be largely redrawn? The painful effort required seems frightening, almost overwhelming. What we do more often than not, and usually unconsciously, is to ignore the new information. Often this act of ignoring is much more than passive. We may denounce the new information as false, dangerous, heretical, the work of the devil. We may actually crusade against it, and even attempt to manipulate the world so as to make it conform to our view of reality. Rather than try to change the map, an individual may try to destroy the new reality. Sadly, such a person may expand much more energy ultimately in defending an outmoded view of the world than would have been required to revise and correct it in the first place. Transference: the outdated map This process of active clinging to an outmoded view of reality is the basis for much mental illness. Psychiatrists refer to it as transference. There are probably as many subtle variations of the definition of transference as there are psychiatrists. My own definition is: Transference is that set of ways of perceiving and responding to the world which is developed in childhood and which is usually entirely appropriate to the childhood environment (indeed, often life-saving) but which is inappropriately transferred into the adult environment. Balancing By this time I hope it is becoming clear that the exercise of discipline is not only a demanding but also a complex task, requiring both flexibility and judgment. Courageous people must continually push themselves to be completely honest, yet must also possess the capacity to withhold the whole truth when appropriate. To be free people we must assume total responsibility for ourselves, but in doing so must possess the capacity to reject responsibility that is not truly ours. To be organized and efficient, to live wisely, we must daily delay gratification and keep an eye on the future; yet to live joyously we must also possess the capacity, when it is not destructive, to live in the present and act spontaneously. In other words, discipline itself must be disciplined. The type of discipline required to discipline is what I call balancing, and it is the fourth and final type that I would like to discuss here. Balancing is the discipline that gives us flexibility. Extraordinary flexibility is required for successful living in all spheres of activity. To use but one example, let us consider the matter of anger and its expression. Anger is an emotion bred into us (and into less evolved organisms) by countless generations of evolution in order that our survival may be encouraged. We experience anger whenever we perceive another organism attempting to encroach upon our geographical or psychological territory or trying, one way or another, to put us down. It leads us to fight back. Without our anger we would indeed be continually stepped on, until we were totally squashed and exterminated. Only with anger can we survive. Yet, more often than not, when we initially perceive other as attempting to encroach on us, we realize upon closer examination that that is not what they intend to do at all. Or even when we determine that people are truly intending to encroach on us, we may realize that, for one reason or another, it is not in our best interests to respond to that imposition with anger. Thus it is necessary that the higher centers of our brain (judgment) be able to regulate and modulate the lower centers (emotion). To function successfully in our complex world it is necessary for us to possess the capacity not only to express our anger but also not to express it. Moreover, we must possess the capacity to express our anger in different ways. At times, for instance, it is necessary to express it only after much deliberation and self-evaluation. At other times it is more to our benefit to express it immediately and spontaneously. Sometimes it is best to express it coldly and calmly; at other times loudly and hotly. We therefore not only need to know how to deal with our anger in different ways at different times but also how most appropriately to match the right time with the right style of expression. To handle our anger with full adequacy and competence, an elaborate, flexible response system is required. It is no wonder, then, that to learn to handle our anger is a complex task which usually cannot be completed before adulthood, or even mid-life, and which often is never completed. Mature mental health demands, then, an extraordinary capacity to flexibly strike and continually restrike a delicate balance between conflicting needs, goals, duties, responsibilities, directions, et cetera. The essence of this discipline of balancing is giving up. Balancing is a discipline precisely because the act of giving something up is painful. As must everyone, for as we negotiate the curves and corners of our lives, we must continually give up parts of ourselves. The only alternative to this giving up is not to travel at all on the journey of life. It may seem strange, but most people choose this alternative and elect not to continue with their life journeysto stop short by some distancein order to avoid the pain of giving up parts of themselves. If it does seem strange, it is because you do not understand the depth of the pain that may be involved. In its major forms, giving up is the most painful of human experiences. Thus far I have been talking about minor forms of giving upgiving up speed or the luxury of spontaneous anger or the safety of withheld anger or the neatness of a thank-you note. Let me turn now to the giving up of personality traits, well-established patterns of behavior, ideologies, and even whole life styles. These are major forms of giving up that are required if one is to travel very far on the journey of life. In regard to the last of the above, it may seem to many that the ultimate requirementto give up one's self and one's liferepresents a kind of cruelty on the part of God or fate, which makes our existence a sort of bad joke and which can never be completely accepted. This attitude is particularly true in present-day Western culture, in which the self is held sacred and death is considered an unspeakable insult. Yet the exact opposite is the reality. It is in the giving up of self that human beings can find the most ecstatic and lasting, solid, durable joy of life. And it is death that provides life with all its meaning. This secret is the central wisdom of religion. （to be continued）
标签: 人生规划
